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Laughing stock: August comedy shows

Comedians performing at comedy venues around San Diego this month include Joel McHale, Eleanor Kerrigan and Adam Ray.

Comedians performing at comedy venues around San Diego this month include Joel McHale, Eleanor Kerrigan and Adam Ray.

8.4-5 Joel McHale

“Hollywood helps America by projecting a heroic image to the rest of the world. We just released another movie about Captain America. Or, as he’s known in China, Captain Who Owes Us $1.1 Trillion.”

— Joel McHale at the 2014 White House Correspondents’ Dinner

@ American Comedy Co.,

Joel McHale. (Ethan Miller/Getty Images)

8.4-5 Adam Ray

“I got peer-pressured to do mushrooms over the summer. … It was my first time doing mushrooms. It was also my first time talking to a daddy long-legs about global warming.”

—  Adam Ray at Gotham Comedy Club

@ The Comedy Store,

Adam Ray. (Frazer Harrison/Getty Images)

8.5 Joe Rogan

“I love pot, but the people that are making edibles need to slow the f*ck down. Oh, my god, what are you trying to do to people? I had a pot gummy bear the other day. I think we should all agree a gummy bear shouldn’t be able to steal your soul, right? How the f*ck are these people making these things, man?”

— Joe Rogan on Joe Rogan: Triggered

@ San Diego Civic Theatre,

Joe Rogan. (Kevin Winter/Getty Images)

8.10-12 Michael Ian Black

“Will be attending a BBQ today. This will be my third social event in four days, a new personal best. Thanks to my coaches and staff.” — Michael Ian Black on Twitter

@ American Comedy Co.,

Michael Ian Black. (Rick Kern/WireImage)

8.18 The Comedy Get Down (Cedric the Entertainer, Eddie Griffin, D. L. Hughley and George Lopez)

“I’m going to say something that not a lot of people will say right now: white lives matter. Let me explain. Who’s going to make meth? Who’s going to turn the carnival rides off? Who’s gonna go to Whole Foods? Not us!”

— George Lopez on Showtime at the Apollo

@Valley View Casino Center,

Comedian George Lopez will perform at The Comedy Get Down. (Mike Coppola/Getty Images for The Natural Resources Defense Council)

8.18-19 Steve Trevino

“Women are very expensive creatures. You single men in here, listen to me: You see a woman with highlights? Run. That bitch is expensive. God didn’t put stripes in her head; a gay man did. And that sh*t costs money.”

— Steve Trevino at The Improv

@ The Comedy Store,

Steve Trevino. (Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images)

8.18-20 Hari Kondabolu

“America can’t tell the difference between a ‘Muslim’ & a ‘terrorist,’ but expects us to differentiate between a ‘latte’ & a ’flat white?’”

— Hari Kondabolu on Twitter

@ American Comedy Co.,

Hari Kondabolu. (Nicholas Hunt/Getty Images for Turner)

8.25-26 Eleanor Kerrigan

“I do look like Caitlyn Jenner, right? That is a f*cked up thing. I can’t stand this. All my life, I wanted to be Bruce Jenner. Now this bitch wants to be me.”

— Eleanor Kerrigan at the Hollywood Improv

@ The Comedy Store,

Eleanor Kerrigan. (Ethan Miller/Getty Images)

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